12.31.2009

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!


Well it's about 2 minutes till new years and I just wish everyone the best new years ever! This is the perfect opprotunity for a fresh start, new things and a new you. Someone said on one of the blogs I read to leave things that happened in 09 in 09, so I suggest everyone do just that because there is no point in bringing the past into your present or your future, ya dig?

Everyone seems to be posting their new years resolutions, but I don't have resolutions, I have goals (yes there is a difference, you don't force goals, you aspire to reach them)


being nicer to my family- I have a mean streak in me but I think I should try to be more patient with family because weather I like it or not, they are my family and they love me (some of them) like no other and I have to cherish that and not be so willing to stop talking to them

get ready for college- I have only one year left in high school and then it's off to college so I have to start my portfolio so I'll be set cause ain't no way in hell im gonna be a bum at home while everyone else is living the college life

kanye's workout plan- Every time I go to the doctor she says I'm as healthy as a horse and I never understand why when my diet consists of chocolate, cake and cookies galore and I work out maybe every other week, so imma try to "work it out" every other day and watch the transformation, I do wanna look good for my 17th b-day : )

get out more- I love to go out but when the weekend comes and I have the time to go to the club I let my laziness sop me from fun, even though I need the sleep I feel like I should be out there having fun and meeting people...

MONEY, MONEY, MONEY- I have to learn how to save my cash because I know I'm high maintenance and the cheap stuff does not work, I don't wanna have to buy the cute jewelery that I know will turn my neck green or buy clothes I know aren't high in quality because I don't have the cash to buy the good stuff

Um, I think that concludes my goal list for 2010,I'm so excited!!!!

I'll holla at y'all later, stop by and tell ZODIAC how your new years was : )

ALL because tomorrow is NEW YEARS!!

OK, THIS NEW LAYOUT TOOK ME ABOUT 3 GOOD HOURS TO MAKE, SO I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE IT. I would go into what I had to do just to get this template like this but I don't even wanna think about it lol. I just wanna start fresh and new for the new year so I had to make sure the blog was fresh iight? BUT ANYWAY, my morning wasn't so great and it's not because I spent so much time trying to do the impossible with this blog, but because my stepfather made breakfast for everyone in the house except me : (  ~insert "aww"~, it's 1:12 pm as of now and my ass has not even put a morsal of food in my mouth! I guess I better get on that, I'll be back later for sure. peace.

12.29.2009

Those bed sheets must be COLD!..cause i ain't wanna see that shit

So I finally went to go see my brother and sister yesterday, which means I had to see THE BOY aka my dad.
Every second I spent in his house was excruciating! He kept asking me questions that he had no business asking. I feel like if he really wanted to know how my life was going he would put in effort to be in it. But any way, I had a wonderful time with my siblings. I love them so much and I can't believe theyre growing so fast, I remember when they were in the womb. : )

But anyway on to the good stuff, so I was talkin to my stepmother but she wan't looking at me and so I was just opening and closing this one drawer in her nightstand, and I turned my head and my eyes got so big! I could not believe what I saw. I was beyond disgusted! It was a purple, see through dildo!! I was so embarassed and scared, so needless to say I stopped playing with the drawer. Now I feel like dildos are more for single women who can't get none or they dont feel like asking no man for no d*ck, but here is this woman that is married to my dad, who can get some at anytime and I know this because I heard them on many occasions, who has a dildo. Even right now as I'm typing this post I don't know what to think. Just the thought makes my mind go blank. Well I haven't been there in a while so maybe the bed sheets got cold, I mean my dad did cheat on her so...I dunno that's their mess and it's up to them if they wanna clean it up. But DAMN! Zodiac ain't wanna see that shit! WHO DOES?!

12.28.2009

A moment with Zodiac

Hello everyone, I would just like to take a moment to tell you all how much I appreciate your comments and the fact that you guys took the time to read my blog and get to know me. I love all of my readers (I don't like the word followers) and I love you all. My first blog only had 5 readers but now, I have 65 flavors of the Zodiac checkin in and leaving comments and whatnot. I love making you guys laugh and I love making you guys think and you guys have returned the favor all the time because there were plenty of times you guys' complements made me laugh and made me reach into the deepest abyss of my mind. LOVE YOU GUYS!!

OH AND TO MAKE YOU GUYS LAUGH CHECK OUT THESE VIDEOS OF MARTIN LAURENCE IN HIS FAMOUS ROLE OF "SHANANAE" lol, laugh your pants off






12.27.2009

well my x-mas sucked!!!

Gosh, I dont even wanna remember my x-mas. It was the worse. This year my mom felt like we shouldn't celebrate because of the economy and I was cool, but she told me her idea before I knew how I would truley feel. So on christmas morning I was expecting there to be gifts under the tree anyway because I mean, come on, who doesnt want gifts?! But there weren't any gifts and the damn tree looked like a weed plant. How you gonna get your tree on christmas eve? Gosh! (in the napolian dynomite voice). So I go downstairs to see my mom and my two bad ass cousins (I'm pissed that those lil brats are at my house for their whole winter break!) and when I said hello to my mom, I got the nastiest attitude from her! So that kinda pissed me off and I was two seconds from goin in my room and not comin out for the rest of the day, but because I was trying to be nice I stayed downstairs(I WAS ABOUT TO TURN INTO A REAL GRINCH). I offered to cook breakfast and everything, I'm sorry but I can cook better than my mom, and she gonna tell me no! At that point in my mind I was like "alright, don't ask me to do shit for the rest of the day." I don't usually offer to do things so when I do I suggest people ride the wave lol. Then she gonna get mad because she wanted decorations on the "tree". She seriously yelled at my and my auntie because there weren't any decorations on the tree! So we put the damn lights and decorations on the tree. I got plenty of texts and calls from people who were having a "merry" christmas and when they asked what I got I was almost embarrased to say "nothin'", but oh well, it is what it is.

Then my other aunt, the one who starred in my mini story "be mature or smack a ho?!!", came by my house. This bitch had the nerve to curse my mom out the day before, so she was most def on my shit list, but for the sake of my mother and the kids she didn't recive my gift of a slap, cause old girl needs what that dude got in my previous post lol. But she did drop off gifts for my lil cousins so that was nice. I guess the best part of my day was eating the food, of course I had to help my mom with the mac and cheese cause hers come out tasting like just noodles and if I wasn't gonna get gifts there was no way in hell I was gonna eat a unsatisfying dinner, but my dinner was excellent! and I finally got to watch Precious (i know, i know, not a movie to watch on christmas but keep in mind, our day was just another day but we had a big dinner) it was an excellent movie, and I plan on reading the novel. BUT I GUESS CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT FAMILY, SO ALL IN ALL MY CHRISTMAS SUCKED BUT I'M HAPPY MY FAMILY WAS THERE BECAUSE WE DID HAVE SOME LAUGHS : )


but anyway it's cooks b-day today!!! she's 18 now, a grown ass woman, so if you guys could just wish her a happy b-day at http://www.lyricalthoughtz.blogspot.com/ it will be deeply appreciated!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!!

12.24.2009

i would do this to some people if it wasn't CHRISTAMS TIME


HELL, SOME PEOPLE NEED IT

12.23.2009

I lied, I'm sorry...

i do happen to have christmas wish list. there's just some things that are just too hot for me not to want it.
(btw theses pic are just used for commentary reasons)


this BETSEY JOHNSON "spotty tote" is too cute, I have a thing for animal print, especially color animal print so I think I need this.



the GLITTERATI PUMP from forever21



the ROGERI TROOPER FASHION BOOTS from forever21 to complete my bad ass look lol



the TALL GLADIATOR BOOTS from forever21. my mom has these but I have to get my own because she's not sharing and her feet are a lil bit bigger than mine : )



and of course some cash so I can hit up victoria's secret and the MAC counter and so I can get some new clothes. There were more shoes that I wanted but this post would have lated forever if I continued with my wish list to satisfy my shoe fetish lol. I LOVE HEELS!!

12.22.2009

YOUR alter ego...

I never really introduced my alter ego "ZODIAC" to people outside of my blog family, but I have her name written all over the place, so of course I get a lot of questions. "What does this mean?", "Why did you name her Zodiac?", "Why do you have an alter ego?". I guess I wanna really explain Zodiac as best as I can, but I really believe I am the only one who will understand her completely, but here goes....

I came up with the name Zodiac because I have this interest in the Zodiac. I find it facinating how characteristics of zodiac signs can really fit how a person acts, but anyway, when I realized I had this "other side to me" I really couldnt give her a simple name because she isn't a simple, ordinary person. She's exotic, almost everything I'm not. She is everything you can think of and everything that contradicts it. The zodiac has EVERYTHING in it, so that's when Zodiac was born. Why did I name her Zodiac? Well for one, who ever heard of the name "Zodiac"? It's different, when you hear about someone's alter ego it's usually a ghetto name like Kiki, Candy, Delicious, or something like that ( NOT THAT I KNOCK THOSE NAMES, REMEMBER KYLE FROM "COLLEGE HILL", HIS ALTER EGO NAME WAS KEYSHIA), but I have to have something different, something that would stand out, something that would be the very definition of my alter ego without me having to explain her. Why do I have an alter ego? Well, to be honest the plain MS.B is quiet, sensitive, a nerd at heart , I can be sassy, but Zodiac kicks in when I step outside my door. To be honest I don't trust enough people to wanna let them get to know MS.B, you can't trust people and there are no such things as "friends". But Zodiac and I are one, she is my bitch, she is that bitch, the baddest bitch. Uh huh...but here's my question for you guys "What would you name you alter ego (if you don't already have one), and why did you chose that name? What are the characteristics of your alter ego?" THE COMMENTS WILL BE INTERESTING : )

the new year, the new me

2010 is right around the corner, so my swag will be reinvented. I can't wait to start anew. I don't have any new years resolutions but Ihave goals (I'll post those later). Not to mention my b-day will follow not to far after : ). I love to start new and feel like Ican do things with a clean slate. I can't wait to inhale as soon as that ball drops, it'll be my first breath of the new year and oh, it will be sweet because I've been feeling suffocated, made weary with my own obssesion of working hard and being the best.One of my goals is to learn how to relax and to not over work myself, because tomorrow is not guaranteed and I would feel           really bad knowing that I've lived my life without noticing life's precious treasures because my work consumed me. I learned that when my friend KITTIM passed. I miss him..a lot. (17 years young...didn't see it coming)

I miss you, we'll meet again swetie : )

I REALLY HATE THE "P" WORD!!! > : (

"I LIKE A LONG HAIR, THICK, REDBONE"..ok..."OPEN UP HER LEGS, THE FILET MIGNON"...um,what?..."THAT P*SSY..."...ok, I hate the song "Every Girl" officially.
Why in the hell do people refer to the female reproductive organ as P*SSY??!!! I hate that damn word with a passion, but let me explain why: it makes women sound like a object. It makes one of God's most beautiful and important structures sound like something one can just use and throw away. I have no idea if I'm the only female that feels this way but I really hope I'm not. That word always has a bad meaning and I hear women use it! Do men really have that much influence??!! I'm sick of hearing it in songs, I hate to hear it in movies and iIHATE to hear it in everyday life. I feel like these stupid men need to have more respect for the very thing that gave them life, held them for 9 months!! And women just need to stop using that word all together, I know everyone is going to have their own name for their genitils but "P*SSY" NEEDS TO GO FOR FEMALES ASAP. OK, I'm tired now lol, but this was just somethin iIhad to post ast 12:21 am, I must love you guys. But yes some opinions would be lovely because I need to understand why people use this word for women..."P*SSY"..ew.

12.20.2009

the LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT award

love at first sight



Ok, I created this award because I just felt like giving you guys some awards. This award will go to nine blogs that I feel like are so dope I just have to tell y'all it was love at first sight, I mean y'all are the reason I STAY on blogger : )


Alrighty so here are the rules: Just pick five (or more if you like) blogs that you have been in love with ever since you first checked them out then under that blog name just give one reason why you come back for more.

HERE ARE MINE:

I love this blog because her words speak to me, she gets deep and she has swag. She mad real all day everyday.

she is too damn funny, and she reps for the lesbian community.

when I tell you this blog makes you think (and laugh) I am not lying. btw, you guys should snag some of their shirts.

we all knew her as PIA but now she goes by KOREA, she is creative and random, much like myself and I appreciate her blog, and she has a lot of buzz so go check it out asap

this blog is emotional and I dig it *nods head*

hilarious and real, she made me laugh to tears and made me shed tears before and I used to watch "The Wire" before they rapped it up and she is nothing like those b-more chicks LOVE HER

a bad bitch who knows how to keep it real

DAMN! when I tell you this lady knows how to paint a pitcure I do mean it, hmmm, if your feelin freaky just give this blog a shot, oh, and she tells me I'm beautiful so she makes me feel special : )

And last but not least by a long shot, this is my number nine

This is my friend, my walking diary, and my favorite lesbian in the whole world!!, not to mention my classmate. I love her blog because of the poetry, her words are extraordinary and I feel special that I'm able to read her notebooks in person, I LOVE YOU COOK!!!
 
Glitter Graphics

R.I.P Brittany Murphy


Wow, only 32 years old. My stepdad said everyone is checkin out, I guess he ain't lyin.
She died of a heart attack and I feel so bad. R.I.P mami <3

12.19.2009

two throw back joints and a WTF???!! video

LL COOL J- DOIN IT (remember this?....)


JODECI- CRY FOR YOU (love it, I miss them)



this is straight ignorance and,,ya know what, I'll let you guys comment on this one, parents make me sick nowadays, but wow come on! and old boy was right, the baby is cute but why in the hell would this "mother" put a wig on this baby??!

I've come to my conclusion...

As many of you know, if you read my blog, I have a tendency of thinking a lot about everything that life throws at me, so I was in my mothers room (don't ask why) thinking and this is how I looked...

This is me thinking about how funny it is how people are fake and will turn on you at any given moment

This is me wondering why I let people get close to me and really thinking about what I should do

This is me going "hmmmm.."

and this is me smiling because I've reached my conclusion : I can't stand females and I have 5 great friends in my life and I don't need any more. I rather have 5 honest , true, loyal friends than 100 fake ass, phony "friends". LOL I'm surpised im in this situation because I knew this, but you live and learns everyday and sometimes the lesson needs to be taught twice. But on a lighter note, I went to the Knicks game yesterday and it was TOO good, KNICKS WON! But the clippers did their thing, for a second they were ahead, but NY was represtenting!!

12.17.2009

my rant in school...

Damn, I'm in school, in the library in my lunch period and I am not happy whatsoever. I swear if another one of these rude shit bump into me imma just blow up the school all together. Oh gosh and if my english teacher gives us one more assignment imma tell her about herself, even though I like her as a teacher. *shurgs*

I was thinkin about christmas because it not too far away at all, and I've decided that I don't want anything. If someone floats some cash my way I'll be happy but I'm good. Honestly the thrill and excitement of this holiday has worn off ever since I figured out that there is no damn santa. I mean come one, I can't go in the closet because why? There's special bags in there? PLEASE...I figured out what it was at the age of 8. I don't need toys, and I have a laptop a ipod and a cell phone. WHAT MORE COULD I WANT?? I just wanna go to the club to be honest, I have some steam to let off.

Well, I'm finish with my ice cream and my chocolate rice crispies treat so I guess I'll end this post at school so I have something to say when I get home. OH SNAP, I JUST REALIZED I TOLD Y'ALL THAT I WANNA START MAKING VIDEOS SO I CAN MAKE YOUS GUYS LAUGH! I SHOULD ASK FOR A NEW DIGITAL CAMERA WITH SOUND! WHAT? GUYS ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS BE PREPARED TO LAUGH AND SOMETIMES CRY AT THE LIFE OF ZODIAC. BUT IMMA MAKE Y'ALL FEEL ME CAUSE SHIT IS REAL.

12.15.2009

the NONCHALANT attitude..lalala i DON'T have time to care



*deep sigh*, I just wish that people would realize that I have too much on my plate right now to care about petty issues, nasty stank attitudes, and personal problems. I mean if I care for you I'm more than willing to be there but if your gonna come at me sideways, we're gonna have issues. I just felt like walking up to everyone that decided it was ok to talk to me today and put my g-shock in their face and say "U SEE THIS G-SHOCK?! THERE IS NO TIME ON THE WATCH OF ZODIAC FOR YOU OR YOUR SHIT, SO TAKE YOUR HAPPY ASS TO HELL AND GET THERE SAFE." Kinda mean right? *shrugs* Too bad I don't care, and when I'm having a bad day I don't mess with anyone, but the problems still come to me. But it's all good because I still have my dream of going to college and that and the fact that God chose me to wake up every morning is what keeps me going.

BUT, of course people in other states even like to bother me. So there I was in my second to last class, happy as hell that the day was about to end and here goes this boy I met in MD that caught feelings for this JERSEY CITY PRINCESS, and I consider him my best friend but old boy feels like I should marry him! So we argued through text but then I just told him to "shush..." He texted back but I didn't reply because I was tempted to call him and curse him out, but I decided to let it out a better way, through my poetry. This is what I jotted down while I was supposed to be learning about cations and ions and all that jazz:

I'm disintegrating
Eroding as you walk away
Tears over wasted time
But hurt over guilt
I had no business taking your heart or giving you mine
I waste of time it was, thinking we were in love
when we was
what we was
but what were we?
Victims of the lure of the forbidden fruit
That's what it was
Are you dissolving like me?
Can your knees hold you up
or did I make you weak like you did me?

By this, ok before I tell ya'll what this means lemme break it down, he had a girl before he met me but told me months after I started to like him and trust him. But I kinda disregarded their relationship because I felt like if he checkin for me and he's with her he must not be into it, but that's not right, even though I don't know the girl from Adam. So now I feel guilt even though the situation makes it spilled milk, but I told him we can't be on the phone all hours of the night  subliminally flirting because we both have someone at home, and yesterday Allen (my man at home) made me very happy. I got my hair done and he kept playing in it and he was surprised my hair almost touches my bra strap because I wear weave. So then he walked me home and we held hands and we spoke and laughed and he asked me what I wanted for Christmas (insert AWWWW!). Now that I've blogged I feel alot better. Peace out ya'll, till tomorrow : )

12.13.2009

my weekend, and how Tiger Woods fucked it up

Friday: Went to my friend April's house to chill, I had to get out of the house and it was the first time I chilled with someone here in my punk ass town. (I HATE it here!!) but she not from here so it's kinda different, AND did I mention she's my boyfriend's sister?  But anyway there were two dudes there, my niggas Alvaro and Kevin. I was scared because as soon as I walked in Alvaro gave my the eye, and in my mind I was thinkin " I hope he know that we just friends and that I'm not no ho!". Alvaro don't know what it's like to be around Black girls so I will get the neck and eye rollin on him with the quickness and not think twice. But anyway they were actin wild and I just went into my own lil corner so I could laugh at them, but then here comes Alvaro tryin to kiss me. I told him I got a man but obviously he didn't care, so I pulled away. Then he got mad and was like "Why you playin hard to get??" I wanted to yell at him and all of that but he was sexually frustrated and I wasnt beat and  I was just like "I'm not playin hard to get." So about an hour later he and Kevin left to go to the club, and he left mad. This is how I feel, when Alvaro and I first met I did think he was cute and I saw alot of potential in him, so as I got to know him better I began to have deep conversations with him about him and life and I guess he was attraced to the way I made him think because not too long after he began to change. He want my nigga anymore, he was a dude that was tryin to get with me. But I don't wait because I don't have patience, and if he felt someting before I got with Allen then he should have stepped to me like a man and said something upfront instead of tryin to get in my pants and then hoping that we would grow from there. That don't work for me and Alvaro has alot to learn and I'm not about to be his mama. But other than that my Friday was good.

Saturday: I woke up and decided I wanted a bikini wax! (go ahead and laugh) I wanna start doing it at home cause I'm tired of shaving cause it doesn't  last long enough and you look "prettier" down there if you wax as opposed to shaving cause you don't get bumps or discoloration. So me, April and Ashley went to rite-aid to get the wax. Of course we were actin crazy and extra Black but we had a good time and was laughin the whole way there until I looked to my right and saw the newspaper stand with a picture of Tiger Woods crying. I don't know the whole story, I just know that he was in a car crash and all of a sudden there's rumors about a sex tape and a love child and him cheating. (If someone can enlighten me that would be great) I mean, people love to talk about shit they don't know about and I felt really bad for him, and thats how he fucked up my mood cause that picture just brought down the while mood lol, but I pray for him beacause the headline said he was suicidal, and if that's the case I hope he gets better.

Sunday: Well my man finally came home from Deleware and we spoke. I still like him but it was weird when we spoke. No longer do I feel intense butterfllies, I felt numb. And not that good numb, I mean numb like I felt absolutley NADA when we spoke. But it's all good though, when he comes to my house tomorrow I should get some circulation for him in my heart again. But Sunday has been very relaxing and easy, my mom brought me lunch and I got some much needed sleep. I've been thinkin about gettin a new camera so i can record some videos and out them on here, wouldn't that be great cause I need ya'll to hear my voice when I say certain things lol. I plan to have ya'll crackin up.

12.11.2009

nah..just a threat..

I think being a ho is wrong. I think stealing somebody's man is wrong, but I don't know how to feel if you are just sitting there and your looking pretty to a man that has a girl. I don't know what to think when you know you make another woman feel insecure. The immature and ignorant side of Zodiac would say that it's on her. You can't help it if her other thinks you're attractive, and you can't help it if a man that knows he has a woman looks at you with lust or interest. On the other hand, it's a horrible feeling to know that your other has an eye for another woman, but what if you are that woman? Are you in the wrong? And I don't mean you gave that man the eye or even payed him any attention, I mean you're just there minding your own business looking cute.
I'm the threat to someone and I don't like how it feels cause she tried to make it seem like I did something wrong. She got mad that her man called me cute, but I wasnt even paying him any mind. I was too busy txting my man. That night she told him, "I don't wanna lose you. I know she's prettier than me but please don't leave me." He told her to shut the hell up and I thought that was funny but I felt really bad, but then I had to think if I should feel bad. I wasnt even attracted to her man but even if I was she's my friend and I wouldnt do that to her. But I really felt bad that I was the person to make her feel insecure. Hmmm, but I didn't do anything wrong and if she's insecure about her looks then that's her internal struggle and I have nothing to do with that and she can't blame me for her personal physical issues. No one can blame others for that in a situation like that. I hate the saying, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." because it sounds stupid, but I will say this "Don't blame others for your insecurities."

12.10.2009

A LOVE LETTER...or whatever you wanna call it (a freestyle poem)

Before I start this I would just like to say that I feel like I been slippin with my poetry because I've been too into my music (I'm a r&b artist), and I really feel like this right now...enjoy.


you contribute to the saga in my life
but I don't mind
I don't care
you contribute, but you're not there
it's like I'm connected to you
like we share one heart beat
but you bruise my heart every chance you get
you hear my cries like it's your favorite song
but I don't mind
I don't care
you're here, but invisible like air
I don't want to find you on my think
so I go to sleep
but your even in my world with the unconscious me
shit must be deep
you found your way into my soul
you found a way to make me care
you found a way to make me surrender me to you
I should mind
I should care
but I don't
I should snatch myself away from you
but I won't
at the end of the day I am your life line
I am the blood in your veins
I'm that angel on your shoulder telling you I'm here
massaging your ego and tending to your every need
the greed
but I don't mind
I don't care
I hope karma comes back to me, and one day you'll be there

(I do copywrite my shit so please don't try anything slick)

12.09.2009

I DON'T WANNA BE A BARBIE...(no offense nicki)


Iight, everybody wanna be a doll or a barbie. Hmmm, I got mad love for ms.Nicki Minaj HOWEVER, I have no desire to be a Barbie. Why may you ask, lemme tell you:
  • B.A.R.B.I.E.S mean "bitch ass rabid bitches imitating everybody's swag" to me
  • Why the hell would I wanna be fake beauty?
  • Why would I wanna fit into the idea of what beauty is?
  • I might have to dye my hair pink,blue, or some crazy color like that
  • I stopped playing with Barbies a LONG time ago
  • I have my own swag
  • I'm on my grown woman status, so being a "Barbie" does not satisfy my swag

A Barbie is a piece of plastic that has air brushed make-up on it to make it pretty. I want to be beautiful because I'm me. Not because I dye my hair pink and because I slap on alot of make up and wear bright colors all the time. And besides Lil Kim started this Barbie ish, and that has been played out for a long time now. Now Nicki is a bad bitch to me (well before lil wayne watered her down), but I could care less about her "Barbie movement". And I love me some Lil Kim, but she was beautiful before she injected her lips and cut off her nose and changed her hair blond. That shit is fake and I will never understand why she couldn't appreciate her real beauty. I mean sprucing up your looks is one thing, but they are doing complete 360's to feel pretty. Neither one of their body's is real, yeah didn't know that did you? Nicki ain't all that curvy and we all know Lil Kim's boobs float lol. God gave us what he gave us for a reason, and i feel like we should look in the mirror everyday and love what we see. F*uck what we see on t.v. or what other have to say. JUST BE YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE YOUR OWN BLUEPRINT, THERE IS NO REPLICA, unless you have a twin.




NOW THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE, BUT MISS PIGGY IS THE BADDEST BITCH. THE REAL H.B.I.C, and she ain't even a real human but she never claimed to be a a Barbie.

my glue, my track, and my weave is down my back!

Ok, so I live in a town full of Hispanics. Most of them have that beautiful, healthy, shiny, long silky smooth spanish hair and I love it, but what I don't love is when they get a little bit too curious about weave! I mean damn, they act like it's some type of science to weave. Like one girl asked me about using "human hair" for your style, and I broke it down to her that if you use human hair you can wet it and use heat on it. Then the bitch asked me if you can dye it, since it's human hair. I gave her a blank look then said, "uh, no. if you want different color hair you buy different color weave." But she really pushed the fact that since it's human hair that you should be able to do whatever you want to it. It was kind of funny.
 Oh my gosh and once I was told from one girl that she heard that you have to cut your hair to get a sew-in. I was gonna say "how the hell are you gonna sew the weave in if you have nothing to sew it into?" But since she was uneducated about the wonders of weave I just laughed and said, "no, you don't cut your hair, you just braid it up."
 Now , I'm not ignorant so I won't fault them for something they don't know, but what I do mind is that they insinuate that you are bald if you wear weave. I rock half wigs and I love them, but I am no where near bald. If you take a look at my picture on your right (the black and white one at the top), you will see that I'm not bullshittin you. Doing your real hair every morning is time cosuming and I do not have time. And what people don't nderstand about Black hair is that it can't be all out and about all the time. Draw-strings, half wigs, buns, braids and sew in's are protective styles and are best for Black hair. People can call a woman fake all they want to but at the end of the day weave is cute, except when you leave it in too long and it starts to look like you tried to put a brillo pad into a ponytail. I mean I do my natural thing, but it's because I have "good" hair, but not every woman wants to do that, so if you wear weave, more power to ya! If your against weave, all I have to say is that it's a personal choice. (IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT WEAVE OR NATURAL BLACK HAIR YOU CAN JUST HIT ME UP ON MY AIM: miiszodiac, OR MY E-MAIL:jerseycityprincess@yahoo.com)

12.06.2009

for once i'm scared to cry...one of my "waiting to exhale" moments, advice please

I would like to start of my saying that my weekend since friday has been shitty. More shitty than a damn toilet. So on Friday I went to my grandpa's funeral. It was the first time I saw a actual dead body because it was open casket, but he was handsome. They put him in a white tux and his flowers were beautiful, I hope he was happy with his homegoing. This was the second time I saw a mother bury her child, and it caused me great pain to see my great grandmother cry and on top of that she just buried her other son a month ago. This is why I don't go to Jersey City (my home town), bad memories and experiences. That's just Friday.

So on Saturday I was wondering where was my boyfriend, he didn't call me all that week and I was beyond pissed cause here I am hurting and crying and I expect him to be there for me cause I'm there for him but, no. So that very same day I found out his stupid ass was in jail. Then all of a sudden he texted me and was like "anything you have of mine, I want it back". So then I asked him what's wrong, and at first he didn't wanna tell me but then after beating it out of him he said I was kissing another dude. Definitley didn't. But at this point im ready to let go because he was willing to believe someone else over me and that hurt and had me pissed  but at the end I told him to recollect himself and I'll collect myself and I will see him tomorrow so we can talk about it and try to work it out with relaxed minds. I don't believe in talking things out when in the state of being pissed. At the same time that let me know he cares because any other dude would have left without  notice and did him after hearing something like that about his girl.

Today it's Sunday, and me being the good woman I am, I go to this negro's house to spend some time with him and talk it out, but he wasn't there. All I have to say about that is if he isn't willing to put any effort in it and he won't meet me half way then I'll just go and do me because I'm a good catch and I'm young and like the new boyz said " she (he) ain't gonna tie me down!" but I do have some feelings for him, but if I have to let go I will. But what really pissed me off was the fact that I told him that I just buried my grandpa and he still came at me with that petty bullshit! I dunno guys...I just don't know. Imma go watch some t.v. now, but please, I need some advice. SHOULD I HAVE CHEATED LIKE KEYSHIA COLE SAID? I wanted to cry, but Briani is too strong to let that happen, I won't give him that much energy.

12.02.2009

the weave, acrylic nails, the make up, the lies

I listened to "j.cole-losing my balance" and it really spoke to me. As women is all the make up and weave and nails lies or are they the things that makes us, us? Before I listened to this song I thought my nails and my weave and the little bit of make up I do wear (lip gloss and mascara) was my style but to men, are they lies? Are they the things that contribute to the masks we wear everyday or are they just us? And if you think the make up you wear and your weave and the nails or what have you is just what makes you you as a woman, why do those things make you feel better about your apperance? I really had to think about this shit. DID WE LOSE OUR BALANCE?

In the last verse of the song he speakes about a woman that has this bad body and she basically fine as hell to him, but it's her mind that "made him lose his balance". Rather than go to the club and pop champagne, she would choose to rent a movie and get close (not in a too much on a first date kind of way), and she had old boy sprung, to the point where is friends felt neglected, and ladies ya'll know when a man neglects his boys for you that means you got him whipped. Now my question is why can't more women feed men their minds? Men have a natural need to be satisfied sexually (I learned this in my psych class), but I also learned that it is a woman that will make a man learn to appreciate a converstaion. Men love to think and they will respect a woman that will make him think a different way, but at the same time if she's not the visual he needs then most likely he won't give her the time of day. Men always say that women don't know we want but do they know what they want? I've come across men who complain about weave and make up and all of the other things they consider "fake", but if she took off that weave and was walking around with brillo pad hair, would he stick with her then ,even though she has this beautiful mind that he supposedly fell in love with in the first place? DID THINKING ABOUT THAT MAKE YOU LOSE YOUR BALANCE?


 THIS IS THE SONG BY J.COLE, YOU SHOULD LISTEN FOR A MINUTE (IM SERIOUS)

love waiting for you



Have you ever wondered who the person your going to marry will be? (if your not already married). I wonder how my life is going to play out all the time but what really makes me think is who am I going to spend my life with? Do you think about how you might meet said perosn, how they're going to look, what attracted you to them, what made you fall in love. I truly believe there is someone out there for everyone because there's so much out there, but I think it's important not to force it cause true love just happens. But things like this is deep to me because love is sacred and I think that God created a person especially for all of us, and that is something special. I just hope we all find love, nowadays we need it.

11.26.2009

have a wonderful holiday!

Everyone, I hope ya'll have a blessed and safe holiday and eat until you burst cause I know I will lol.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

11.23.2009

just thought you should know..

it's not easy holding back tears...I miss you.

11.21.2009

COLLEGE HERE I COME!

OMG!! I MADE HONOR ROLL. For a minute I was telling you guys how hard junior year is cause it has been kickin my ass, and for a minute I thought I was failing some classes but a smart bitch like me made honor roll in the first semester. YAY ME! That means three things...I have to stay focused and do better, when I ask my parents for something they can't say no and that I'm starting my junior year correct so college better get ready for a sexy, smart and sassy force to walk through those doors. HOLLA! I HAVE DREAMS GUYS AND ONE OF THOSE DREAMS IS TO HAVE A BENTLEY AND A LOFT IN SoHo, and for that dream to come true i need to be making serious cake, and the only way to do that is through an education, right or wrong?

ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL?

ok...(the word that turned the tables)

I dont know what the hell is up with my mom and her stank attitude but at one point she was two seconds from my foot in her ass. As fed up as I was with her nagging and ranting about things that had nothing to do with me, I refused to give her my energy, so when she was like, "..and you need to do what i tell you to!", all I said was a simple "ok". It was emotionless and it pissed her off. Mission accomplished.

11.17.2009

letter to my past...

I can finally forgive you for the pain..I can honestly say I miss you. If you think I feel any resentment, your wrong. Life is too short for me to deny my love for you, I'm not in love with you though. I thought of you yesterday and I actually smiled. you still have that effect on me, even though your not what I need. I have to protect myself, that's why we're not together. Honestly, are you ready for a woman like me? I know your not but I still linger in the back of your mind, but I can say the same about you. We will always be friends and if you ever need to feel unconditional love you know where to come. 6 years and counting...can you believe it?



love forever, zodiac

11.14.2009

DRAKE: a virus

I don't give a damn who you are, you heard Drake's music... you can think he's LAME, or you can think he's "the f*ckin best", but I dont like Drake but guess what?  I found myself humming "BEST I EVER HAD". Drake spread like a virus..am I right or wrong? lol, but at the end of the day that light skinned mofo is makin his cake and pushin out those hits, gotta respect it.

is bullsh*t on the menu today?

nobody is looking for much when they're looking for a boo. i truely believe no one's stadards are too high, but it pissed me off what happened yesterday. ok, so im at the chinese spot after school with my girls and we see this fine ass dude. nice caramel complextion, waxed brows (it didn't make him look gay), tall, rockin waves, nice lips, big brown eyes, you guys get the picture he was just fine. and he was dressed fresh to death. so he sees us and we all lookin good (especially moi, cause he was tryin to talk to me), and he walks over. i wasn't trying to get with him cause i have a boo but i saw nothing wrong with exchanging some helllo's. this is how the conversation went:


me: hi, how you doin'?
him: I'm good shorty, no wat Im sayin..you fine.
me: ok thank you
him:can I get your number sweetie? I'm tryna see what's good with you
me: well if you wanna know what's good with me I'll just tell you now, GOD blessed me and woke me up this morning and I plan on walking away wfrom you in about two seconds
him:damn ma, why?
me: ok first of all sweetie, you askin for my number and you don't even know my name cause you weren't smart enough to ask. second of all you don't know how to talk to a lady, and that's what I am so have a nice day, I dont have time for this.
him: you kinda stuck up
me: no, I just know what I want and how I want to be approached, and if I have to educate you on how to do that obviously your not man enough for me

*big sigh*... this is what I call someone having bullsh*t on their menu, and that dude really tried to serve it to me. "bulls*t" can be defined as anything you don't have time for and I do not have time for a dude that doesn't know how to talk to a female. I didn't want him to sweet talk me or to offer to pay for my food, I just wanted him to show some respect and to make it known that his mama taught him somethin. I expect girls to be better but sadly, we're not. I can't tell you guys how many times my guy firends would be like like "yo Bri, i just saw this bad chick but she was so stupid!" or somethin like that and the girl was serving serious bullshit. At the end of the day I want everybody to be boo'd up (shot out to khaki), but how are we gonna accomplish my dream if we keep serving each other the BS??!! We gotta get it together asap people.

11.11.2009

prince: a sexy beast



I wish I was bold enough to wear butless pants lol beacuse I would have everyone working up a black sweat

and one text had me f*cked up...

I make it no secret that I have no relationship with my dad, thats how bad we are. But one day while I was in english yelling at my teacher I got a text from my cousin. She said "your father texted me and imma forward it to you." When she said that I was like "oh boy, this nigga make it his business to work my nerves!" I was turning beet red and I was thinking of how I was gonna have to yell at him when I got home.

 Finally I get the message. I was on the verge of tears. It said:
"I just dont wanna go into the new year without being in her life. I love my daughter and she's growing to be a beautiful young woman and I just don't wanna miss out. I know I'm not perfect but im trying and I apologize for putting her through what I put her through. please tell her."

I have no idea how to feel because on one hand he said this sh*t before so one side of me is just like "please shut your lyin ass up" but then again I do love my father and I feel a void in my life from time to time because he's not in my life and time doesn't stop just because I feel empty at times and we cant get time back, so it's either the relationship happens or not. I feel like my dad might be growing into a man finally but I don't know..is it too late you guys? I don't have time to catch him up on my life and I don't have time to teach him about me again. I'm not a baby or a little girl anymore and he missed out on very important times in my life, one being my 16th birthday!

honestly it pained my heart for him to think i want him to be perfect. no one is perfect, and i don't want him to be perfect, i just want him to be there.  i think i'll go cry now...

love at first sight..

I swear I didnt mean for it to happen but it did. Its not love but the feelings are too strong for it to be so soon. As of now he talks to me more than his girlfriend. DAMN! i'm not the type to wear my heart on my sleeves and im not the type to be nice when i first meet someone but..he found his way into my heart and quite frankly it's freaking me out!

i don't play games but im never 100 percent truthful with guys but this dude makes me wanna pour out a love letter everytime I talk to him...hmm... is love a possiblitity? But at the same time WHAT DO I KNOW ABOUT LOVE? I'm only 16 (going on 17 in about four months)..we're the same zodiac sign and his b-day is a day before mine. Needless to say we have ALOT in common. wow..guys tell me what to do!

11.09.2009

Do you believe in love at first sight?..cause I do..and tonight I see you (chris king holla at me!)



DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT?

DO YOU THINK LOVE CAN BE THAT INSTANT?

HAVE YOU FALLEN IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT? 

GUYS..I need some opinions so don't be afraid to comment..part two coming soon

I smell ????..but who is it?

I've been checkin out everybody's blogs and what not and believe it or not, alot of you guys have something in common. I will not say any names but alot of you guys are at that "experimenting" stage in your lives. I think it's cute and I think it's normal but some of you guys are afraid to "go outside the box" because your scared of what people think. People are gonna talk regardless and f*ck what people think! If you spend your life worrying about how people think you should live your life, you will never truely live it and you only get one honies!

 I've formed lil friendships with some of you and the last thing I would want you guys to do is jump into this "experimenting" thing blind so here are the rules (YES, I AM MOM RIGHT NOW LOL)

  • CONDOMS ARE A MUST (MALE AND FEMALE)
  • make sure the person is clean..like for real, they have to know how to take a shower
  • no ugly people
  • don't let somebody that you met in the club be the person you "experiment" with, I dont want hurt feelings
  • don't do if if it don't feel right, go with that gut feeling
  • HAVE FUN, BUT BE SAFE PLEASE!!!

back in the day # 4

(GUYS..i know i been slacking with this lol, i promise my blogging schedule will get better)
this os the classic jam that makes EVERY woman feel like a girl again, FOREVER MY LADY-JODECI




PRECIOUS brings back some memories for me man!

I can not wait for that movie to come out! It's gonna be here in Jersey on Friday so I'm gonna throw my sexy on just for this movie. I like to watch movies that make me think or wish I was in them but "Precious" brings back some memories for me. When I used to be a big girl (or at least thats what people called me), I used to feel so hurt. I used to walk with my head down (litterally), I was quiet because where I lived it seemed like your opinion didn't matter if you didn't have the perfect body. My mom didn't abuse me the way Monique did Precious in the movie but I was forced to cook alot because I was forced to take care of my lil cousins (that's why i hate kids).

Now that I've lost the weight and I feel invincalble, I NEVER forgot how things used to be and when I first saw the previews for this movie, it took me to a place that I still visit occasionally so I stay grounded. Alot of teen girls can relate, but I hope to GOD that incest will stop and nobody has to have their own fathers child!

For those whose town isn't showing the movie it sucks to be you! (just kidding)

11.06.2009

i MUST have that good good

WE ALL HAVE OUR FANS RIGHT AKA HATERS, WELL SOMEBODY THAT WAS KINDA IN MY CIRCLE ALWAYS MADE HERSELF SEEM LIKE SHE WASN'T A HATER BUT ALAS! THE BITCH MOST DEFINITLY IS. Ok so I have a new boo ok, and he his fine! Six foot two, in college with a car and a job, so he got it goin on. I dont mind that other girls look at him or try to talk to him because he only got eyes for me and he's proven that to me on many ocassions but one bitch slipped up.

So one day when my man is about to go out with some friends and this girl approches him trying to spit some game. Hmm..if he was really interested he would have tried to talk to her, but anyway, he tells the girl ,"I have a girl, you probbably know her, her name is BRIANI." SHE SAYS :"Ew. your talking to BRIANI? She's fat and bald with big lips and she ain't a virgin." HE SAYS: "If you're trying to talk to me why are you so concerned about her?'' SHE SAYS: "OH..I didnt mean it like that." HE SAYS:"I gotta go."

That night he told me the story, so I had him describe to me the girl. Turns out I know the girl! We used to be kinda cool, I never tried to f*ck with her like that cause she's a hypocrite, a liar and a phony and she just proved my judgement was true. So my man told me not to worry about her cause she was just hating. Hmm..I just wanna know one thing. HOW IN THE HELL WOULD SHE KNOW WHEATHER OR NOT I'M A VIRGIN IF SHE NEVER TOOK A TRIP IN MY VAG? I would really love to know. And if she really felt like I was'nt a top notch bitch like I am then she wouldn't have found the need to bring me down. But it's ok cause my man made her feel stupid and I'm not even trippin cause I don't have time for no trick. She just got herself added to my list of fans.

I COULD REALLY PUT HER BUSINESS IN THE STREET IF I WANTED TO.but I'm above that.
lol, girls are so dumb, THAT'S WHY I'M A YOUNG LADY. (stupid bitch...)

10.27.2009

GOD'S SOLDIERS


Shiloh Pepin passed about two or three days ago and my heart was so crushed. She was only 10. It amazes me that this young lady lived with something called "mermaid syndrom" and she lived life to the fullest everyday. I can truly say we encountered one of God's soldiers because she did not let the fact that she never walked be her limitation. We could only be so lucky to have lived life the way she did with two legs. Rest in peace little angel, you were the perfect mermaid.

10.26.2009

LEMME INTRODUCE YOU TO FINE


DAMN!!! I AN SOOO JEALOUS OF EVA!!

Playing Russian Roulette


Hmm..do I like the song? Not really. Do I think the beat is hot and  plan to make a remix to it? Yes. Ok. Who doesn't love miss Rihanna? She has got more stlye than Beyonce has in one finger (thats just my opinion), and her songs are catchy (even though she made me wanna punch her in her throat in "we run this town"). Alot of people are not happy with her new single. Some people are even appauled because it's not only the fact that people don't see Rihanna as a singer but how dare she have a sing about suicide? The girl has gone through a lot this year what with being beat up on and all but damn! Could it really be that bad? Hit and miss rihanna, hit and miss. But she is still a bad mofo!

10.22.2009

I GOT MY SCISSORS, NOW GET IN LINE PEOPLE...


AS I GET OLDER I REALIZED THAT THE POEPLE I BEFRIENDED IN MY YOUNGER YEARS HAVE NOT PASSED THE TEST OF TIME. One of my supposed best friends that made me believe that we were gonna be friends for a very long time did not pass that test. At first I blamed myself and tried to think what could I have done to save the relationship. That was when I was still naive. Now I realized somethin , I gave that girl all of me, but she wanted more and didn't appreciate it. There's some people at my hell hole of a scholl that I am just so ready to say "peace bitch!" to. Cutting people out of your life can be hard to do when you have or had love for that person but you always have to do whats best for you. You can only give people what you have and if you try to give people more, you will have nothin left for yourself, and you will never know what it truly feels to be happy. But bothersome people and annoying f*cks shouldn't be too hard to cut out of your life. A girl gotta keep it movin!..can't cry about it, but I am sick of feelin like I have too many people around me that's not good for me.

10.19.2009

guy friend vs. boyfriend

Today my mom and I were talkin bout boys ( a touchy subject for her), and she told me she is not ready for me to have a "boyfriend". I asked her why and she told me that with a boyfriend I would have to commit and feel obligated to do things. She said with a boyfriend there would come sex...something she DOES NOT want me doin. She claims she does not want anyone seeing my "lady bits" lol. I thought she was takin it too far though. My definition of a boyfriend would be a boo piece that you kick it with, boyfriend is just a title. But then she explained to me what a guy friend is. A guy friend is a male obviously that you hang out with. You go to the movies with him, go out to eat, talk and all that other good stuff. I thought I had to have a "BOYFRIEND" to have that, but my mom schooled me today. I have a lil "male friend", his name is Allen and he is too sweet. He's 18, in college for marine bio, with a job! I'm not supposed to date until I'm 17 but I don't wanna be dumb about relationships (even though i'm already game to these niggas) so I think it's smart to have a guy friend. For all the moms out there all I have to say is this: tell your child how precious their body is. Not enough people were told and that results in girls being pregnant at the age of 10 and babies being born with AIDS. INNOCENT LIFE BEING CORRUPTED ALREADY..sad. but I am still a virgin and I'm damn proud (so is my mom).

10.18.2009

have you used your brain today?


have you thought today?
think periodically, (that means think sometimes)

back in the day #3

This song is sorta ho i feel about a mr.nijel, this is the perfect song because everybody has has a crush before and this song captured all the symptoms of a crush, IMMATURE-CONSTANTLY...enjoy

I'm back and I have somethin to tell ya'll!!

Guys I seriously feel like I havent' been blogging in forever, its been like five years and I apologize but junior year has been keepin me occupied. Like the new page? It look me forever to do this too cause I wanted somethin more me so I took care of it and now everything is straight. ok..remember nijel? well I still like him and last thursday was  homecoming and I knew he would be there. : ) this is what I wore:

He didnt know I knew but he was staring HARD! I knew I looked good and all and I thought it was cute that I caught his attention. All night I caught him staring at me, but he's shy so he didn't ask me to dance but it's ok because we played each others eye candy all night. It was my fisrt dance at the school and I saw so much. My school is about 99.9% Hispanic and i'm not sayin they can't dance at all cause I saw some girls killin it but OMG!...CAN YOU SAY NO RHYTHM!!??!! LOL
FOR THE MOST PART I HAD FUN THOUGH.

10.03.2009

RIP AJ




I know that Kandi was so in love with this man and it broke my heart that he was killed. I'm sad for his children as well because he had six. She has my condolences and she and his kids and his family will be in my prayers.

10.01.2009

the good..the bad..the ugly

For the first time in weeks I actually felt like crying. I am very stressed, upset, crushing hard and it seems to me like time is going too fast for me and I feel like I'm being left behind.

AS FOR THE GOOD: I FINALLY talked to my crush. I was so scared but when I finally talked to him it was so good! It was funny how it happened cause I kinda yelled at him but still, it was dreamy and absolutely what I've been wanting since last year. Oh...and I auditioned for choral and I made it! Yay for me! I love music!









AS FOR THE BAD: I'm doing just OK in school. I am a serious perfectionist. My teachers say that everything doesn't have to be perfect but that goes in one ear and out the other cause I will not hand in work that's sloppy and less than worthy. That's not apart of the Briani swag. I have to be above the rest with whatever I do especially because I'm tryin to go to college and everything counts. But being a perfectionist is not easy. I give up so much time that should be mine into school work and I know that in the end it'll all pay off but some days falling off a bridge sounds really good. I just wish I could tell time to wait damn minute so I can take a deep breath and get some sleep!







AS FOR THE UGLY: people are gonna make me come out of my character and I will have to start distributing slaps! I'm not a clingy person. I'm independent and I like people who don't like to be up under me unless your one of the people I chill with all day everyday. There's two people that I feel like if they don't see me or I don't talk to them all day they can't go on. It was scary at first but now its just annoying and I'm getting mad! I know I'm a cool chick to be around but I have like five people in my school that I don't mind being around all day everyday, but some people need to take 10 giant steps back and let a girl breathe! They're gonna make me go into "Stewie mode" and just while out. And I swear if one of those retarded freshmen bump into me into more gin imma go off!

9.26.2009

I AM JEALOUS


I'M NOT SURE HOW TO START THIS POST SO I'M JUST JUMP RIGHT INTO IT...I have a dead beat dad. He has my number but doesn't call me. For my 16th birthday I didn't get a "happy birthday" or a gift from him. He neglected me for two Christmases and two thanksgivings. He lies to his family and says he pays child support and he doesn't. When he asks me if I need clothes and I say yes and he tells me he will take me shopping he doesn't. As strong as I try to be, because his lies are nothing new, I still find myself asking God "why me?''. I don't want to question God's plan but I really wonder why he chose the man that he chose to be my father. My mom says he's a sperm donor because it's more to being a father than supplying DNA. I get so sad sometimes ya'll, but anyway, when I watch "Runs House", I really get jealous of Vanessa, Angela,Diggy,Russy,Jojo and Miley. They have a strong, intelligent, providing, understanding, loving, compassionate Black man in their lives, and it pisses me off that more Black men can't or choose not to be like him. I see him interact with them. He exposes them to new things. He only wants top notch things for them. He ALWAYS shows love. He is very understanding and I just wish that I had that. I was actually thinking about writing a book for girls in my situation because a lot of us need guidance, and I see alot of girls go down a bad road because they didn't feel the love from their fathers. I'm trying to be strong. I get very weary from the situation because it seems like every chance he gets he does something to piss me off with his ignorance and lies. I know there's no sin in getting weary, the sin is giving up, and I gave up a long time ago because I feel that there is no more forgiveness in my heart or tolerance in my mind or energy in my body. Thank you Rev Run, Obama, Diddy and my stepfather for being great and awesome men to your kids. You guys are deeply appreciated.

9.23.2009

lesbians on straight women like white on rice


I don't have a problem with gay women. I have two lesbian friends but I can't get with them lesbian women pushin up on me when they know I'm straight. Like I had this one chick ask a friend of mine if I was gay and I was so appalled! How dare she think I would even go that way!?! But hey, us sexy chicks can attract anyone right? But I can't get with bein lesbo. I don't wanna hear no " don't knock it till you try it." or no "i can give you everything a man can." NO THE HELL YOU CAN'T. OK? But like I said I have no problem with people being gay but that's just not my thing. Like have you been pushed up on by someone who wasn't of your sexual orientation? Don't it feel weird? I'm just sayin that people's gay-dar needs to be upgraded cause it's pretty obvious when someone is gay, straight, lesbian or transsexual. And we have to respect each others space.

back in the day...#2

WHOOOOO! ladies I know ya'll hear me when I say that this song is still the SH*T!! NOBODY can tell me different, I know ya'll will enjoy this one..SILK-FREAK ME


9.16.2009

back in the day....

I'm a 90's baby. Born in '93 and proud of it, so on my ipod I will say that about 92% of the music is 90's r&b and hip-hop. I feel good when I hear these songs so every week I've decided to take ya'll back to when music had lyrical content and meaning without the explicit BS. Enjoy... "DO YOU WANT TO"-XSCAPE


i need comments for this one

OK. So there's this girl that I know that likes this boy and they are in the same grade and everything. She's pretty,stylish and smart and she's just a real cool chick. Today she found out that her crush has a girlfriend, and get this, she's a freshman! I was so mad when she told me cause I knew she really liked the boy and wanted to get to know him, but he chose a skank stank nobody over a top of the line dime. How that look? And he is a junior! (we are in high school) When she told me I felt bad for her because I knew she was crushed, but that's what crushes end up in right? Being crushed. I told her to just move on to a boy that can handle someone his age and not take the easy way out, and even though she was like, "yeah.yeah, your right.", I knew inside that she wouldn't let go. I don't wanna tell her to be a home wrecker but hey, if she want her man that bad I think she should go get him but at the same time I wanna tell her to keep it movin. I usually have the right remedy for my friends but I really wanna steer her in the right direction on this one. What's a girl to do?

9.12.2009

(some) PICTURES OF THE WEDDING

This is a piture of the venue...ain't it fly?




I believe we were at PIER 16 park when these
pictures were taken.




DON'T THEY LOOKE LIKE THEY

STEPPED OUT OF GQ? LOL